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Amintiri din televiziune: Gore Bolundu

Gore era șoferul. La Tv Deva și mai apoi la 3 Tv. Normal nu era. Dar era simpatic. Râdea tot timpul. Era miștocar din cale-afară. Avea școala din cartierul de dincolo de linia ferată. Pe toată lumea ironiza și nu știai niciodată când vorbește de-adevăratelea sau când glumește. Avea acea siguranță a șoferului care crede că fără el lumea stă în loc. Că de el depinde orice mișcare în televiziune. Dădea și cu ciocu la director și chiar se bucura de protecția acestuia. Pâra tot ce se întâmpla la filmări sau în deplasările pe care le făceam. Nu că nu ar fi avut ce pârî și deja eram obișnuiți că dacă făceam prostii, a doua zi ne-o luam. Unii îi permiteau și se obișnuiseră cu el că mai mult nu poate, alții îl țineau la distanță iar alții chiar se temeau de el. Mai ales Startrecii cei tineri, mai nou veniți, care nu știau cu cine aveau de a face. Dar nimeni nu putea spune că atunci când se găsea alături de bolund, se plictisea. Avea ceva molipsitor, miștocăresc și șugubăț, în toată simplitatea lui, care te făcea puțin mai vesel. Pe lângă toate cele Gore al nostru mai avea o hibă sau chiar două. Mințea de înghețau apele. Rar rostea o frază fără să nu încerce sa te traga pe sfoara, rar când trebuia să justifice ceva şi nu trăgea o gogonată de nici el nu o credea.

trei băeţ

De la stânga la dreapta: Bena, Brilinsky, Gore. Şi nu doar Gore era bolund.

Și ca orice șofer care se respectă, ciordea. Așa, pe mic. Dar ciordea.  Mai un litru de benzină, mai o bieletă decontată moca, mai un schimb de ulei în plus, ba mai scotea câte un furtun de la locul lui și mințea că nu merge mașina și că trebuie să o ducă la service. Venea uneori transpirat, murdar, puţind a benzină şi inevitabil cu o poveste că vai ce s-a mai întâmplat, ca atâta a muncit la maşină de nu mai poate Și mereu cu zâmbetul pe buze și cu satisfacția că l-am fentat și pe ăsta. Greu te puteai baza pe el și când îți era lumea mai dragă și totul mergea ca uns, își băga Gore coada și îți tăia elanul. Dacă te plângeai la director, protectoratul funcționa și nu te alegeai decât cu ranjetul disprețuitor, peste umăr, al lui șoferică. Da până când, am zis într-o zi.

Era vineri dimineață. Aveam de mers la o filmare la Orăștie. Era campanie electorală și trebuia să filmăm un clip. Alții stăteau la rând, Macra şi Bibanu aveau planificat ceva la Călan. Colac peste pupăză mai intervine şi un accident grav la Surduc. Gore ia-l de unde nu-i. Pe la 9 sună telefonul şi directorul Liviu Sas ne anunţă că Gore este la service, că maşina e stricată şi că vine într-o oră. Ne uităm unii la alţii şi ce să-i faci, ăsta-i Gore. Ne apucăm de altceva, mai discutăm un pic, trece o oră, Gore, din părţi. Mai stăm ce mai stăm şi mergem la şefu. Ăla dă din umeri. Telefoane mobile nu erau pe atunci. Unde-i Gore ? La ce service ? Mergem cu taxi să-l căutăm ? Ce drac să facem ? Mai trece o oră  şi lui Bibanu, pe numele adevărat Călin Stănculescu, îi vine o idee. Măi, asta-i zi pierdută. Hai merem la o bere. Chiar aşa. E vineri, Gore nu-i, amânăm filmările, dăm ceva reluări şi gata. Ba nu, băgăm ceva muzică. Hai la bere ! Hai. Dăm ignore la dom’ director care ne dă potol că o să vină Gore şi coborâm de la cucurigu Casei de Cultură, jos, in spate, la Tropicana. O bere, două, trei, uităm de Gore şi ne dăm la poveşti şi la râs. Vreo trei ceasuri să fi tot stat acolo şi când eram gata să plecăm, regina şoselelor, dacia noastră papuc, de culoare gri, scârţâind din toate încheieturile, intră în trombă în parcare cu Gore la volan. Ne piere râsul. Acu-i acu. Dăm să ne repezim dar…

Gore coboară tacticos din maşină, priveşte în jur, nu ne vede. Noi pândim parcă intuind că prindem peştele cel mare. Gore îngenunchează lângă maşină, îşi baga mânie dedesubt, şi le freacă de scut şi cu ele asa năclăite se dă pe haine. Pe pantaloni, pe cămaşă, pe pantofi.  Nu-i destul machiajul şi mai bagă mânile şi în praful de pe jos şi se dă si pe faţă ca să fie mai convingător. Apoi o ia către studio. Râsul i-a pufnit pe toţi, mai puţin pe mine. Păi futu-ţi soarele cui te-o făcut în p…a mă-tii de nemernic ce eşti – şi mă reped către el. O scatoalcă după ceafa lui groasă, potop de înjurături din folclorul local, palme, pumni, picioare în cur şi jos cu el în iarbă. Vedeam negru în faţa ochilor. Şi dă-i, tataie, ca în sacul de box. Ceilalţi râdeau  şi Gore mai spera că e glumă ce-i fac. Până la un picior sănătos în coaste. Atunci a început să urle de s-a oprit circulaţia. Şi trecătorii care nu înţelegeau nimic. Şapte oameni râdeau în hohote, unul guiţa ca la tăiere şi altul dădea orbeşte în mormanul rotofei de slănină din iarbă. Mai miloşi din fire, Alin şi cu Sorin Kosz m-au luat de lângă Gore aproape cu forţa.

Cu greu, ajutat de Bibanu,  Gore s-a ridicat. Acum da, chiar era machiat corespunzător ca să convingă pe oricine că întârziase din cauza maşinii stricate. No, acu du-te în p…a mă-tii la Sas şi zi-i ca ai fost la service, i-am strigat din braţele lu Bena.

O săptămână nu ne-am vorbit dar maşina mergea strună. Nu se mai strica. După aia ne-am împăcat, la o filmare la Chimindia. Maşina a continuat să meargă fără reparaţii. Apoi ne-am despărţit. Televiziunea noastră nu mai era. Fiecare a luat-o pe alt drum. După vreo şase ani pe o trecere de pietoni, un taxi frâna in scrâşnet de roţi, mai să mă calce. Speriat, în gura mare, am slobozit eternul: în p…a mă-tii de dobitoc! Trage taxiul pe dreapta, imediat după trecere. Mă pregăteam de scandal. Când colo, din taxi coboară Gore cu zâmbetul larg până la urechi şi-mi strigă :

Nici nu ştii cât de dor mi-a fost să mai aud odată cuvintele astea de la tine!

 

Vladimir BRILINSKY     

Comments

comments

cioaravopsita

383 Comments

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    Ce har ai, Nunule, si ce poveste de vremuri faine!
    Astept urmatorul episod! 😀

    p.s. Poza e super-misto!

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